Look inside your tiny mind

Is it love when you first see them?
When they first catch your eye?
Or does it eventually fabricate
into a love you can't deny?

Is it love when your spine gets goosebumps,
and your palms start to sweat?
Or if you're reminded of them hourly,
from sunrise to sunset?

Could it be that newfound feeling,
that tingle in your tummy?
Or could it be your bundles of laughter
because everything they say is funny?

Could it be when you start missing them
the second that they leave?
Because their lack of presence
becomes so hard to conceive...

Is it love when you start crying,
because you found out everything was a lie?
And they never really loved you,
After dedicating your heart, body, and mind?

Is it love when your heart is broken
into infinitesimal little pieces?
And after every yellow ray of sunlight
a tear from your eye releases?

Is it love or is it hate
when you doubt what you once felt,
possibly because you're mad at fate
for the hand that you've been dealt?

Was it love or imagination?
I can't seem to figure it out
Was it love or infatuation?
Because I'm not sure what LOVE is about..

-S.

So there's alot going on right now!! I know I have been slacking on my blog but I've been kinda afraid to write in it ever since I realized how easy it is to find it through search engines. Ahhh well. Stick it in your juice box and suck it! So I have recently moved in with my Nana again. Yes, I said again because it isn't the first time that I moved in with her. The first time was when my mom was still with Mike and I was having difficulties respecting his authoritah. This time it was because I went out to a teen night club and I didn't come back until the next morning. What I did was seriously not even worth getting in trouble for!!!!! Because the people that I ended up hanging out with were completely ignorant and stupid. I say this because I got my feelings hurt. A guy that I thought liked me in fact didn't like me at all. He was basically just a womanizer who was trying to get with ME and my FRIEND at the same time. I'm sorry but I don't associate with grimy ass players.... ANYWAYYYYY to the good news. Teresa will be coming to mersa high school [name disguised for protection] with me next week! I'm so freaking happy about it because I have a few friends at this school, just none that I can completely trust. She's planning on saying goodbye to all her gateway people and joining me here at "MHS" haha. Sooo Jay. The asshole. is back in my life. DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA.

I can't even describe how dramatic everything seems when it has to do with him. We have more mutual friends than I knew because now I'm finding crap out that didn't even know before!!!!!!!!! To go into detail--- there's this guy.. We'll call him "Jake" because I like that name. Well... "Jake" was a friend of mine in which I instilled trust into. One day I was crying about Jay and "Jake" was there to help me vent. I told him some things I shouldn't have told him and he blew it all out of proportion! He told (we'll call this guy Ron) Ron that Jay had raped me! What a terrible lie!!!!!! So now Ron and Jake see Jay as a rapist.

Anyway. That pissed me off. And another thing... (Let this girl be Mariah) Mariah went and BOTHERED Jay about me. Bothered him. So he got annoyed with my name. She got him so annoyed, to the point where he didn't want to hear it anymore, so he told her that I was a big regret, I'm annoying, and he tries to avoid me. Dude. This was like a stab in my heart. I was so upset that I felt like PUNCHING him.. Maybe cutting his balls off.

I miss my family :( Living in ********** is soooo boring sometimes). I feel bad because I feel like I'm losing touch with my mom.

I'm fat. I weigh 140! Lol jk I'm not fat. I want to be 135 lbs.


Ohhhh and Joel.. Hmmm what can I say about Joel ^_^ He makes me laughhhhhh I need that.


I'm not serious with anybody right now. Maybe I'll find out about a random guy that likes me or something ^_^

Anyway... I've written too much.

HASTA LUEGOOO :p

SASHA